Thursday, January 26, 2012
'I love you' is a phrase overused and easily misunderstood. Saying it is all too easy. I'd like to try 'I Thank You' instead. Here is my submission, at 4h29am. I've had no sleep.
You’ve combed my hair when it’s been all in knots; you’ve rubbed my feet when they’ve ached. When I’ve been distressed, or hurt, or disappointed in my friends and in myself, you have stayed on the line to comfort me. You’re never afraid of silences. When I hang up you wait a minute and call right back, without a word of resentment or criticism, just quiet understanding. It’s as if you can sense what I’m feeling and you know just when to call. The most extraordinary thing about you is that as much as I push you away in my spells of anger or distress, you’ll stay right there, unmoving. You’re so stubbornly devoted to me that I wish every day that I had the same patience, wisdom and integrity as you. Never a single grudge have you held. Not once. Not ever. I know I haven’t been easy, but you always help me come round. Sometimes I fear I have little to give you in return for your enduring kindness and love. I can be cold, distant, reactive. I know that you find my conflicted nature challenging, but you never give up on me, even long after I’ve decided to give up on myself. With gentle, firm words you tell me to snap out of it. That’s all I ever needed. Thank you. I don’t know what else to say.